“You didn’t scare me, you startled me.” Elliott’s accent came through thick on the scared, dragging it out automatically. “There’s a difference.” It was a joking kind of defence, told with a warm smile and equally warm body language.
“Hi.” He repeated Blaine’s hello softly, the smile transitioning from a joking one to something far more raw – his entire body behaviour becoming that little bit SOFTER as Blaine whispered. God, he was just to cute for Elliott to even deal with.
“You’re not sorry and you know it – but I think I can let it slide for one of my favourite people.” He used the arms around Blaine’s waist to pull him closer again, leaving them chest to chest as he pressed a kiss to Blaine’s head.
“Sort of the same thing, isn’t it,” Blaine grinned as he watched Elliott relax easing his guilt for making the poor man jump. Startling and scaring were pretty similar in the whole jump reaction factor. Either or was not the reaction he was going for but all was well and he was drawn into the warmth that the other began to radiate once again.
Being pulled in close, Blaine’s arms went up to wrap themselves around Elliott’s broad shoulders. One wrist caught with the opposite hand and locked gently in place. He lifted his heels up to catch a kiss to the edge of Elliott’s jawline before letting his forehead against the steady rise and fall of Elliott’s chest.
Hazel eyes fell lightly shut and he lingered there, relaxing and letting himself be held. It was a peaceful thing to come home to at the end of a far too long day. Whatever they were becoming together, surprising as it unfolded, was quickly becoming something safe, warm day in and day out. Could he expect anything else considering who he was becoming it with? Absolutely not.
Rachel could feel the slight shaking of Blaine´s body and
she could tell that he was crying too. She adored him even more for trying to
hold it together for her sake, though she would have never expected him to do
that. He had a right to grieve about their loss as much as Kurt or her did and
he shouldn´t be the one trying to bear it all. They were all in this together
and as hard as it was sometimes Rachel felt as if they were lucky that they had
each other.
She held onto him for a little longer, trying to take deep
breaths and to calm herself down so he´d get a chance to do the same. Sometimes
she felt better once she´d let it all out and with someone there by her side it
was a lot easier.
Once they moved she watched as he took her hands and rested
them against his chest, a tentative smile tugging on the corners of her lips.
It felt good, to feel the steady heartbeat and the warmth beneath her fingers,
knowing that he was alive and here. When he told her that he´d be back she
nodded, taking a few deep breaths, trying to figure out if she´d be alright.
After a minute she decided that she was good, or well…alright. And alright was
much better than she had felt just a few minutes ago.
When he finally returned she offered him a smile, tears on
her cheeks having dried. “No…thank you.” Rachel the muttered, “I´m fine. Just
tea.” She glanced up at Blaine. “Do you…maybe want to watch a movie? You don´t
have to if you want to go back to sleep,” She wouldn´t keep him from returning
to Kurt and their warm bed, but Rachel couldn´t deny that she was hoping he´d
stay.
Oh God, he just wanted to make her feel better. Kurt, too. Feeling this helpless was awful. Fetching tea and holding someone tight didn’t seem like enough. Common sense told him that’s all they could do for one another. Be there, be close. But he wanted to do more. He wanted to fix the unfixable. And it was the most awful, powerless feeling in the world. Seeing Rachel’s face dry was one small victory that brought him a bit of peace and he’d hang onto it for as long as he could. Use whatever strength it gave him to just keep trying to ease their ache.
They were all too young for this. Too young to lose brothers or lovers or.. If he started thinking on how unfair this was again, he was going to get as frustrated as he did every time that happened. Beyond the furthest meaning of the world. None of this was fair. Unanswered questions and a total lack of any sort of reason or purpose of someone being stolen away was all they had. It was nauseating.
“Okay. Tea it is then,” Blaine waited until she had a firm grip on her mug before he took a sip from his own and crossed back over to ‘his side’ of the bed. He already had one knee about to hit the mattress when she asked him if he minded staying to watch a movie. Rachel was still wide awake and Blaine already planned on staying close until she drifted off again.
Smiling softly as he gingerly sat the mug on the nightstand and stood back up again, he shrugged and went to her bookcase to fetch whatever movie she picked out. “I didn’t plan on going away until you were asleep. Of course I’ll watch a movie with you. Any movie you want. Want some Barbra? Or how about Audrey?”
sebastian would feel bad for how impossibly wary blaine looked if he wasn’t so uncomfortable with the whole situation, himself. he knew he looked like a mess. and with his hair pointing all out, bruises on his face, dark circles under his eyes and cuts on his skin, while wearing a backless hospital gown, wasn’t exactly how he’d hoped to meet the other again, if they ever did. he had hoped in his head, not that he thought about it, as a sort of last desperate win that when they met again, he’d at least look presentable enough to give blaine some regret. the way he looked then, he probably just reminded the other of all the mornings they’d spent nursing hangovers together. not the best presentation.
he downed his head and tried to work inside it what the hell was blaine even doing there. even if by some freakish joke of nature he HAD been the one to find him, he should have gone home a long time ago, when it was clear sebastian was gonna make it. wasn’t that enough even for blaine’s standards of chivalry? he felt his stomach churn as something about the way blaine looked, told him it wasn’t. which was wonderful and meant that now all that was left was for sebastian to deal with his pity. again.
he’d be better off feeling pathetic for imagining blaine had been there to hold his hand when the world started to spin and darken from the blood seeping out of his head. it’d have been a whole inferior level of humiliation than the kind of pathetic he felt NOW, with the other standing there. the fact he had hoped somehow that kurt’s name wouldn’t come up in their first two minutes of conversation, didn’t help.
he sighed at blaine’s response, not bothering to cover up now, there wasn’t much good to it. he rubbed his face, and finally looked into the other’s eyes. ❝is there any doubt?’ he rose eyebrows. was that blaine’s way of telling him something was wrong? he heard the knock on the door right then and looked up just as a doctor walked in. he supposed he’d find out now.
Maybe he should listen and go like Sebastian was telling him he should. Maybe that was the fairest thing to do because Blaine knew Sebastian well enough to know that he wasn’t comfortable with him being here and seeing him in the state he was in. Sebastian had no idea that he’s been here from the start. Defying orders to go and even lying to stay put. All lies and falsehoods that came crashing down when the doctor walked in and broke his tightly guarded secret open.
“Mister Anderson. Still here, hm? Have you slept yet? I told you to get some rest. You’re not going to be any good here if you exhaust yourself. I doubt you want to be taking the bed in the next room, do you?” A quick chiding only shattered the illusion that Blaine somehow magically found out that Sebastian was in the hospital and somehow knew which one it was and appeared here.
What he heard next, though? That was the secret he was hoping he could skirt around until Sebastian was out of here and none-the-wiser on how Blaine was lingering far past visiting hours and being listened to when he refused to leave.
“I’m sure you’re glad to see your betrothed is awake.” The doctor strung out the word in the way doctor’s do when they’re trying to lighten the mood, make a joke you’re never going to get and just sound corny so you laugh anyway. Blaine wasn’t laughing. Only smiling awkwardly like a kid who just got busted with his hand in the cookie jar trying to pretend he was confused on how it got there. “If you would have trusted me hours ago, that sleep would have been a bit easier.”
Blaine’s heart sank, his jaw dropped and his slow turning stare landed right on Sebastian to see his reaction. The truth was out. He was here because he told them he had a right to be. And they BELIEVED him. “I–I.. I know. I was just in a panic. I’m sure you understand why.” From quiet to stuttering, Blaine shut up and sat through the doctor explaining to Sebastian that his wounds were mostly surface. The cuts and bruises were going to heal on their own. But he had broken ribs and a punctured lung. He broke down expected release dates, what would happen as far as treatment. Everything Sebastian needed to know. And when he left?
A click of a door never hit Blaine’s ears as loud. “I swear I can explain why I did that..”
ok but a ‘your apartment is next to/above mine & i can hear you& your partner dancing & singing & the bed moving &you two laughing& talking in hushed tones& it won’t let me sleep so i bitch about it to you 24/7& then one day it just stops& one day turns into one week& then months& i haven’t seen you smile in forever please let me in, i’ve been knocking for ten minutes’ au.
Where one heard music, the other heard quiet instead; a sense of peace provided by a transformation from instinctive, primitive, animal drive into action that only philosophy would ever want to put to words. Even in the midst of chaos, where he harvested sheer anarchy, he was in control, the one to determine what came next. He was both present and future, cause and consequence—He was a God. The Meister alone had always known to make himself stimulating; throw a boasted ego and a satisfied bloodlust in the mix, and the result was intoxicating. His fist closed around the other’s jacket as he leaned in again, shamelessly tasting his mouth in an attempt to quench his unsophisticated, fired up thirst for him. After all, one couldn’t help thinking back to mythology and wondering— what were Gods without their Muses? Lips loosened, caving at the tug of teeth while a lascivious smirk curved the corner of his mouth. “Maybe just a little preview,” he requested, if only not to succumb to the raging desire of devouring him against the nearest wall he could pin him up against.
The sound of retreating footsteps filtered in like the irritating flap, flap, flap of a set of gnat’s wings There was no time to stop him. No real want either. Let him run. The Meister was occupied with better things. There were others close by, too petrified to move let alone run. They would be waiting for him when he was done, if he was ever done… Long fingers twisted handfuls of his love’s shirt into tightly held fists. He swooned. Bending as the small of his back arched against the arm holding him there. Another kiss, another taste that he breathlessly opened his mouth for. He was half-lidded and grinning, eyes bright as the taller of the pair pulled back and made his request. Oh, The Meister knew by the look on his face and darkened shades of forest green that if he didn’t answer it, there might be a problem. But it was a problem that was so, so tempting to incite from the one holding him the way he was. Instead of fully heeding the request–fickle hands moved along a shallow breathing chest. Dipping down lower until the crescent shapes of his fingernails dug into slivers of bare skin they dipped under edge of fabric to make victim to their marks. It should be nearly impossible for him to look coy. Yet, somehow, he pulled it off with a bat of thick, dark lashes and a challenging smile. “Hasn’t tonight been a preview all along? I’m sure you’d like more than that. Wouldn’t you? Or is a sneak peak really going to hold you over? Somehow, I think the answer is no.”
❝ I love you, too.” the taller man breathed, smiling fondly as Blaine settled down on the chair next to him. Uttering those three little words, true as they were and as much as they meant, had become a daily ritual for them. Three words of support and reassurance sent via a simple text message, spoken out loud on their late night video chats or to end their long distance phone calls. Saying it in person, finally, and without once again any distance between them– It really couldn’t help but feel like the beginning of senior year all over again; butterflies swirling around in his stomach and his heart filled with nothing but content as they shared one of hopefully many breakfasts at the loft together.
“They do look especially scrumptious.” His eyes closed at Blaine’s slightest touch before he allowed his insides to fill up with coffee. “I could show you where to get the best coffee and cronuts,” Kurt suggested, his mind soon enough racing with endless possibilities and options of things his newly graduated fiancé might just find especially enjoyable. “It’s sure been a while since I last took the more scenic routes through the greater parts of Manhattan.” Taking the subway was the Big Apple’s way of moving around after all, and as much as he could appreciate New York’s wildly renown urban exterior, hopping between various trains and stations usually tended to a lot faster in terms of viable transportation. Especially when you so happened to be on your way to an important class or audition.
“You are going to love Chelsea and the East Village.”
Hearing ‘I love you’ created the same butterfly wings beating against the walls of his stomach feeling that it did to Kurt. If they weren’t careful? They were going to have a whole oratory of the little buggers with how often they made one another feel that way. From a glance, to a touch, a kiss or three little words..Blaine’s life felt more complete than it had in a year. A reassuring, peaceful feeling that he never wanted to go away. And doubted ever would. Tearing his gaze, starry eyed and full of awe as it was, away from his fiance’ and down to his breakfast plate–Blaine picked up his fork and dug lightly at a strip of cantaloupe sitting next to his stack of pancakes. “I didn’t do that bad, huh,” it was sort of impressive now that he took a look at it. To pull all this off in a kitchen he barely knew without waking Kurt up til the very end. Totally worth it but wow..he made all this for two people? Yep.
“That sounds like an amazing start of the day. After we walk off way too much food..cronuts? Like real New York City cronuts? Yeah. That’s going to be a must. Maybe we can fill up on coffee round two when we’re there. I might need to get one on the way out if that’s okay?” The idea of exploring all of New York City was a bit much to chew off in one day but Blaine’s head was swimming with the idea they might and finding it impossible to keep them on any sort of sensible track. It was better to let Kurt map out their day or he’d have them dashing from one end of the city to the next.
“And then I’m taking you out to dinner. A nice one. No Ifs, Ands, or Buts. Okay?”
“Damn right it’s a good pitch! But dude, we’re in high school. Most of the parties we go to will have alcohol. If you’re so worried about getting shit-faced, pace yourself. Or just limit yourself to one drink. Ya can’t get too drunk with only one drink…right?” Puck wasn’t sure how fast Blaine got drunk. He might be a lightweight. He chuckled at Blaine’s question. “Ya know, that’s a really good question and I wish I had an answer for ya. All I know is that I’m glad I’m not Mr. Schue. Having to deal with all of our teenage drama must drive him crazy! Oh and to be fair, the wanting to drown someone only happened once. It involved Santana and Rachel, but for a completely different reason. Mr. Schue was sick or something and Rachel decided that that day’s lesson should be her. Santana basically wanted to kill Rachel, who freaked the fuck out. It was quite amusing.”
“Trust me, from the sound of it? He doesn’t do much to get involved when there’s real drama happening. So, I’m sure he’s fine..,” Blaine let his thoughts slip in his buzzed haze before he could put a stop to them. Rolling his lips between his teeth and pinching them down with a soft bite, he effectively shut himself up so he could regain his foggy common sense. Letting them go to form an apology, he murmured under his breath. “I’m sorry about that. I shouldn’t have said that outloud. Just seems like he’s pretty good at cherry picking what to get involved with and not to. Bad taste in my mouth after my old school and what happened with Kurt there. Anyway! Do you have a beer or maybe more water? I’m fine with either one and they’d be great to shut myself up before I insult the leader you guys love so much again. Not the impression I want to give off. I would have loved to see what Santana must have looked like when she was about to go murderous though,” he chirped in quickly to change the subject, “Rachel must have been terrified.”
sometimes if you want to make change you gotta make a little NOISE
pianokeysandbowties 