( mssg » killer 🍑 |sent ) Like what? I have no idea what you’re thinking I was insinuating. ( mssg » killer 🍑 | sent ) It’d actually be my honor to come over, killer. ( mssg » killer 🍑 | sent ) Popcorn? That’s a new word for libido. I truly envy your creativity.
( mssg » sebastian |sent ) Oh! Right! No insinuation whatsoever. How did I forget? You’re pure and innocent. How dare I make that mistake??
( mssg » sebastian |sent ) Really? So that’s a yes? ( mssg » sebastian |sent ) Once again.. You never cease to surprise me on how fast you lose the ‘pure and innocent’ title within seconds of trying so hard to earn it.
( mssg » killer 🍑 |sent ) Code word is cute but we don’t have to play that game ( mssg » killer 🍑 | sent ) You can just say it
( mssg » sebastian | sent ) Say what? ( mssg » sebastian | sent ) Oh God. Wait. Hold on. Don’t answer that. ( mssg » sebastian | sent ) How about I word it differently? Would you like to come over and watch a movie? I’ve got a ton of popcorn and there’s no one here.. I could use the company. ( mssg » sebastian | sent ) NOT like that.
❝No. That would be the day that I disown the holiday all together. People are always trying to move so quick. I only get one night in October to terrorize people acceptably but YET I’m being taunted with Christmas music before December even starts? This isn’t a democracy.❞
“Weird. I didn’t know you limited terrorizing people to one night a year. Isn’t every day acceptable in your eyes? You know I’m going to hold you to that statement now? That means no more torturing poor RACHEL at any chance you get. Are you telling me putting up Christmas lights on the balcony was a bad idea?
—Just kidding. I know better. Don’t look at me like that!”
In his life, he’d ALWAYS been a boy without any fears or doubts of himself for as long as anyone who knew Seb could remember (or so people thought). But when Blaine came along creating something different for him, he’d grown to fear HEAVILY ever losing his friendship. He knew too well that he played a risky game when he came around all the time the way he did. Flirting and teasing left and right. Sure, Blaine didn’t seem to mind and every time it felt the shorter of the two with a blush on his cheeks, but who know what he REALLY felt about how Sebastian was with him? What if it was ALL just him being too nice to tell him to stop being the way he was? That possibility for someone so polite like Blaine had ALWAYS been a small doubt of himself that he kept sealed off. The last thing he wanted to do was make him uncomfortable in the end of things. With Blaine, he’d NEVER taken greed into hand. Even if sometimes he may want the ex-Dalton boy all to himself. When it came to being around Blaine, the subject of interest had always been supporting him and being as close to him as he could. Despite the spots in them knowing each other that he had messed up with. The big mistakes he had made at the beginning of things.
Seeing he had gotten Blaine’s attention as he had impulsively intended, his heartbeat sped up RAPIDLY. There he was, Blaine Anderson (the boy he had been DRAWN to ever since he had first laid eyes on him), flawlessly GORGEOUS and waiting on Sebastian’s question now. Eyes charm to the ever-so-adorable smile he’s given by Blaine, and emerald hues scan up and down briefly before his stare settles back on golden hazels. A TUG at the corner of his lips is given to the other, pulling his hand away from his shoulder and slipping it in his pocket. There’s a moment of hesitation when he’s about to ask, lips parted already but eyes narrowing in trivial wonder if he’s being too VULNERABLE to ask this. But he knows Blaine is the one he can always be HIMSELF with. His authentic, true self. The parts he DOESN’T show others. So? Seb says fuck it. ❝You’d tell me if I ever made you feel uneasy —– wouldn’t you, killer?❞
The touch is gone nearly as quickly as it stopped him. Hazel eyes watched Sebastian’s hand retreating into his pocket before darting back up expectantly. He’d be lying if he said his shoulder didn’t suddenly feel so much colder than it was before now that Sebastian’s hand was gone. Not letting himself focus on that notion–he bites his lip and waits. Blaine’s gaze remains curiously questioning as he watches Sebastian seem to sort through a few thoughts in his mind. What was bothering him so much that he looked so hesitant to bring it up? A quick sort through the moments previous turned up nothing that Blaine could pinpoint that might cause that expression. The first question that popped up? –What’ is so bad that you can’t say?– Sebastian was rarely ever the type to hold his tongue. Their endless banter since the day they met was proof of that. If he was hesitant? What could it be..?
The question that Sebastian finally put between them drew black eyebrows up higher on his forehead before they pinched together in confusion. Did he do something to make Sebastian feel that way?
“N-No. I mean yes,” he quickly corrects himself because how stupid did that just sound? Way to make an obviously concerned person momentarily freak out. Blushing at his error–Blaine steps forward and reaches out. This time–it’s his hand that comes to rest on Sebastian’s elbow. A touch to get his point across even more solidly. “What I wanted to say was that you don’t make me feel uneasy. You’ve never made me feel like I should guard myself.” Teeth flashed in a wide smile as he retracted his hand and cupped the back of his neck instead. Fingertips nudge, rub and itch along his skin. “We’ve always been the exact opposite of uneasy.” They were. The ease that he fit with Sebastian since day one was a mystery that consistently baffled him when he thought about it. A connection that he never would question because questioning it might ruin it. There wasn’t a single reason in the world why he’d want to chance doing that. “Did I do something? Act in a way that made you wonder? I didn’t mean to if I did.”
❝God, today was irritating. The office was playing Christmas music. Christmas music. Can you believe that? First off, it’s not December yet and that’s not even where it stops. Went to the store on my way home to pick up dog food and there was Christmas music playing in THERE too. What’s wrong with people, Blaine??❞
“And so it begins. Our annual Sebastian pre-Thanksgiving ‘Why is Christmas happening when we haven’t even cut up the damn turkey’ rant. I think you need to accept the fact that Christmas is getting earlier and earlier every year. Before you know it–heaven forbid–we might start seeing reindeer in July. Wouldn’t that be a complete NIGHTMARE?”
When he hears Blaine say his name, he’s snapped back to earth INSTANTLY and for a moment his face goes soft and gentle whilst his mind tries to recollect what Blaine had been saying the whole time he was FANTASIZING. Staring across the Dalton cafe’ table, an eyebrow furrowing just slightly.
❝I—-❞ he begins under his breath. Not the USUAL mischief running around in his expression. Just a lost stare as he quickly ties to snap back from the stupidness he had come so close to getting caught in. He wouldn’t let Blaine know that in the middle of hazel eyes staring and his words coming out so perfect, Sebastian had fallen into total daydreams about Blaine and he. God, it was almost DISGUSTING that Sebastian had let himself be a victim of something so sickly mushy. He can’t help but let a stupid grin perk up on his lips, attempting to hold it back. He felt like he was flushed but luckily he didn’t visibly blush easily. But finally, he’s staring to try to fill his mouth with an excuse before his smile grows and teeth are shown. ❝—–My brain definitely DIDN’T trail off anywhere, killer. SUCH a liar. Accusing me of something so insane. How could I get distracted while you’re telling me about the THRILLING Batman fanfiction you read last night.❞ Light sarcasm dances in his voice as he laughs a little with a wide grin. ❝You have it wrong.❞
Seeing Sebastian’s gentle expression ran a streak of curiosity through Blaine’s mind. He tilted his head to the side–hazel narrowing on brilliant green. The whisper was so soft. So unlike usual broadcasted Sebastian that it drew Blaine to lean in and curl his fingertips around the lip of the table. “I–,” he repeats back Sebastian’s bare start of a reply but then Sebastian’s grinning and Blaine watches the gentility fade. Almost. But not quite. Because Sebastian doesn’t realize that his facade never really is as strong as he thinks it is. Not when he tries to hide the way he watches him–Blaine sees it and he never wants it to go away and wishes that one day there might come a time where Sebastian’s okay with it being there too. Sure–he hasn’t earned the right for Sebastian to look at him like that. Nothing rings a bell in Blaine’s thoughts of any real reason why he should be so selfish as to have the want to be wanted the way he knows Sebastian wants him. Yet it’s there and sometimes Sebastian wears it on his sleeve. Only to tuck it up out of sight the minute that he sees Blaine notice. Doesn’t he want him to? Isn’t that the point of everything Sebastian’s ever done? To have him see that expression? Or was he supposed to keep letting it slide like he does now because he’s too careful to risk damaging them. Sitting up straight–Blaine laughs at the perfect timing between Sebastian’s dismissal and jab at his expense. The sarcasm is met with a smile and a sassing back roll of Blaine’s eyes. “I understand. You were riveted. That was a really good fiction.” Too bad he stopped talking about it five minutes ago and Sebastian apparently forgot what they he were was really talking about. Let it slide. And he does. “Hey. We have a practice night off. Let’s go do something. What do you think? Or are you busy?”
// Saving this because it really made a rough day so awesome to see Marcel go bonkers over this and the tags. Going in my happy tag for when I need a smile.
Please excuse me while I get all heart eyes! @bcingnicesucks
“Earth to Sebastian Smythe? I haven’t seen you look that lost in a conversation since the last time I called you out on the fact that you can’t request alcohol in your coffee when the coffee shop is on school grounds. Where–exactly–did your brain just trail off to?”
Before coming here, Sebastian really had no idea in particular on what he was going to do for the night until he went back home. He truly DIDN’T have the objective to come straight here. It was one of those nights where he needed to run from his home for awhile, breathe in fresh air and escape the SUFFOCATION that solitude could give him at times. Sleeping was hard a lot of the times for him with all of the night terrors. So many nights, just like this one, he’d just drive endlessly through the night with music blaring. It was an ESCAPE. On this night particular? No matter how much he began to drive he didn’t feel like he was running away from ANYTHING at all. Trapped in a sense. So?? He went to the one place he KNEW he’d find someone who would spend time with him despite it being late night. Someone who made him happy and feel at home (for a reason he could never bring himself to understand). Blaine did that for him, and he played it off as is he had just casually dropped by pretty skillfully. Blaine was quick to hand out with him for someone that had a boyfriend but MAYBE that was just Sebastian’s hopeful mind talking.
One last light laughter over the fact that he’d accomplished at teasing Blaine and a SMIRK down at the texts on his phone screen before he set it aside and lounged back in his seat to wait for Blaine. Flipping down the driver seat visor in the mean time to check himself out in the mirror, gelled hair is adjusted a bit and he makes a model-esque face at himself to assure he looked hot for Blaine before flipping it back up. SURE, they were just friends but they both knew Sebastian would forever want MORE. They were at the point where it didn’t affect their friendship though; Though had it ever?? Eyes glance over to see Blaine making his way to the car, and the Warbler finds himself grinning like an IDIOT all the way until he passenger door is opened. Blaine is greeted with a look that read more than happy to see him. Sebastian always tried to play it cool and be subtle like he’d accomplished at before but at times like this he’s a smiling mess. ❝ What can I say, buddy? I missed my favorite – and the ONLY tolerable – McKinley boy. Get in, sleepy head. You look like you just smoked a joint. ❞ A playful laugh leaves his lips, a pair of fingers tightening around the wheel.
What never ceases to make Blaine feel so amazed by the boy in the driver’s seat is the fact that when Sebastian looks at him? He looks at him like Blaine’s never seen him look at anyone else. There was a light in Sebastian’s eyes that Blaine knew wasn’t there when he started out on his late night drive. No one combs the roads of Westerville in the middle of a fall evening with nothing on their mind and for no reason. They’ve talked about a lot of things by now. Secrets shared that Blaine–oddly–felt okay to tell to Sebastian and let the weight of his thoughts be bared on shoulders that wanted to take the haul. Maybe it was some weird reciprocation thing. Because Sebastian has shared a lot about what goes on in his life with Blaine. Considering some of it wasn’t pleasant or happy? Sebastian might’ve felt like he had to make up for giving over those details by taking some of Blaine’s burdens that he was too cautious to hurt others or make them worry by sharing them. Kurt would worry too much. He had enough issues that they were working through. Blaine would never add to that list. Not that Kurt couldn’t take it. He would and he’d do it willingly over and over. Blaine knew that.
What he–also–knew was that he was carefully selfish to keep these thoughts or details about his life to himself until Sebastian came along. Then the layers of careful were peeled away by someone who has been there. In their own version that was similar but different. A common ground of loneliness in ways built by empty, large houses–gifts to keep themselves occupied–and a world that most kids their age would give an arm and a leg to have until they knew it came with dinners eaten alone–yet one more phone call of Sorry, son, can’t make it and experiences you dealt with alone that could chip away at self-confidence or leave you feeling–well as quiet (because Blaine didn’t want to use any other words to describe it, not even in his own thoughts) as the house that was soon to be in their rearview mirror. Sebastian lived for moments when his father wasn’t around, it seemed. Blaine lived for moments were his was. The biggest contrast but still oddly..alike emotionally. When he was settled in and the blanket he wished he could share with Sebastian and not end up with them driving off the road was pulled up to his shoulders and he was a ball in the driver’s seat facing his friend? Blaine reached a hand over, cupped his fingers over Sebastian’s palm on the stick shift and laughed. “Me? Smoke a joint? Are you nuts? Yeah..no. Where are we going? I know a place if you’re interested and awake enough. It’ll take us about an hour to get there though. Unless we’re already en route to somewhere? If so? We can wait until another day.”
pianokeysandbowties 