( mssg » barry | sent ) I’m completely basing this off the fact that both times we’ve been around one another this late at night, you were awake. Granted, that might be because we were stuck in storms but..um. Anyway. ( mssg » barry | sent ) I was curious.. If you are awake? Would you like to meet for coffee? ( mssg » barry | sent )
Which, now that I think about it, is totally counterproductive when it comes to getting sleep like a normal person. Hot chocolate? A drink? If that’s more your thing?
( mssg » barry| sent ) Oh boy. Could I make this any more awkward?
// I hope all of my lovely followers and partners had a wonderful day and that your holiday went/is going amazingly! I adore each one of you and thank you from the bottom of my heart for being here! With Christmas season winding down at my work, I’ll be around a lot more often. Catch up time is underway now that my brain can actually function. And I’m about better too! Woohoo! I love you cats. Lurking/writing a little tonight. Come say hi!
“I’m sure they’d survive. I’m also sure if Sam WAS here he wouldn’t be any help. You two are horrible when it comes to obsessing over television && film. Blaine — I don’t think your looks are going to get you out of this one. Just because you say you’re not a television serial killer addict, doesn’t mean you’re not one. Not the kind of punishment I meant, Blaine! Really? Yeah no, course, bad time. Definitely a bad time.” Kurt scanned his eyes over Blaine’s appearance a few times before slowly making his way over to the couch by his side. Even after days of being lazy && sleepless, he still managed to be frustratingly good looking. Still, that wasn’t going to sway his decision ( okay, maybe a little ). “Okay look, because I love you too, && I am probably the best ( or dumbest ) boyfriend in the world, I’ll let you finish the two last episodes. I know I’d lose my mind if somebody cut me off before a finale. Though I stand by the fact that I’d NEVER waste that many days on a show about a serial killer. Nobody should. && Blaine? Don’t make me regret this. I’m not opposed to turning off the tv halfway through an episode.”
“Yes. I’m sure they’d survive but that still wasn’t very nice,” Blaine grinned at the comment about Sam because he knew it was way too true to deny. Him and his best friend had that in common. However. Kurt–apparently–is forgetting that he has been known to venture off into the world of binge watching television. And has! Pointing that out would be foolish (and probably lose him his last two episodes leeway)–so Blaine kept that to himself and decided on going a different route. A brow quirked up and seemed to tug the edge of his mouth into the wryest of grins he could manage. “We COULD turn it into that and I COULD watch television later? If, you know, that’s a thing you’re remotely interested in.” Their cushions bounced and shifted under his weight as he brought both feet up and crawled over to take a new seat. On Kurt’s lap. Knees bent against the sofa and their chests touching each other. Inching in to bury the bridge of his nose in his favorite spot ever–the crook of Kurt’s neck was given a nuzzle before cheek touched shoulder and Blaine’s chest deflated in a sigh. “Okay. Okay. I won’t do it again.” Arms wrapped around Kurt’s shoulders to hold him loosely. “This is better than television anyway. You’re stuck now.”
Elliott’s eyes were drawn to Blaine’s lips as he licked them – licked, not rubbed or spitted. His confusion ceased when Blaine spoke again, inviting him to do it and not apologise.
He wanted Elliott to kiss him.
Was he a rebound from Kurt? Probably. Did he think Blaine was going to regret this at a later date? Oh God yes. But that was the logical part of Elliott’s head, and the rest of him…The larger part, that was too busy telling him to just take what he could get while Blaine was still welcoming it.
“I…I could,” He said quietly, stepping closer to Blaine, again taking his hand in both of his own, looking at it as he spoke. “Are you sure?” He’d only ask once, only check Blaine meant it once, that was it.
This was all kinds of could go seriously bad for the both of them. Blaine knew that the minute their lips touched when Elliott spontaneously kissed him. It wasn’t the brush of their mouths together that caused the worry. The look on Elliott’s face when he pulled back was.
But he still said what he said. And meant it.
One part heartbroken and half a dozen more lonely–Blaine wouldn’t take back his offer. He made enough mistakes. If this was another one? What was one more to add to the list? Who was to say this was a mistake? Every red flag going up might only be in his head. They wouldn’t know until they tried.
Two hands–bigger than his–covered just one palm. The delicateness behind Elliott’s touch caused Blaine’s brows to crumple together and his throat tightened. “Y-Yeah. I’m sure..,” he was smiling when he looked back up. A little wary, a lot hopeful but prepared for the worst. “I’m sure,” the words came more solidly this time and his breath stopped as he waited.
( mssg » p. | sent ) I know I said I could do this. That I’m fine with how things are. You have to be yourself and do things at your own pace. I still agree with every part of that. I’d never pressure you to be different. Or step out of your own comfort zone just for me. That’s greedy. I like to think I’m anything but that. ( mssg » p. | sent ) But I’m not sure I can do this anymore. I care too much about you now. I know I’m probably ruining the arrangement we have by saying this. I don’t want to ruin us though. Maybe friends is just better. ( mssg » p. | sent ) No mixed emotions and no one gets hurt. Or hurt worse. I’m sorry. -B.
( mssg » skylar | sent ) Great news! The administration from Dalton just sent me an email! They were able to salvage our piano! I know it isn’t much but it’s something. As soon as the insurance approves, we can take it! ( mssg » skylar | sent ) How about we put it in the choir room at McKinley? Since the other piano got blown up.. I want to present it to the guys as a surprise. Maybe it’ll help boost everyone’s spirits. ( mssg » skylar | sent ) While I’m at it. There’s something else I’d like to talk to you about. Whenever you have the time.
( mssg » duran | sent ) This is going to be weird. Don’t judge me until I finish okay? I don’t know about you but I’m tired of everyone I know tossing their “we made out in the choir room” or “we made out in the library” or wherever else they manage to sneak to off hours stories around when I have absolutely nothing to contribute. ( mssg » duran | sent ) What I’m saying is.. Let’s make our own story worth telling. Meet me tonight? Somewhere. We’ll figure it out. ( mssg » duran | sent ) I’m not saying that’s the only reason why I am asking you this question. There’s others but I don’t want to make you think worse of me than these messages probably already do. ( mssg » duran | sent ) Dear Blaine, this is still a horrible pitch. What are you thinking? Try again next week. Until then? Get your head on straight. You’re horrible at this. -Me
Two minutes later..
( mssg » duran | sent ) Um.. I didn’t delete those..did I?
“No no, really. It’s not that I just ah, I was kind of a horrible person in high school and I want to address that because I’m really not that person- not that I’m exactly great now but I’m really different so..” As if he needed to say that; Sebastian Smythe would have been smooth and casual from the second they spotted each other the other day, while Barry was fumbling as awkwardly as ever and making no sense.
He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Okay that didn’t help my case at all so I’m going to hang up and meet you there and I’ll explain.” Good enough. He only waits a moment before hitting the end button and nearly throws the phone blindly in his exasperation with himself. But that was that, so he had somewhere to be and he wasn’t going to be late on top of it all so he pulls up a map and ignores the looks he receives from a few teammates, making it obvious they heard his end of the conversation. He really was only this bad when he was particularly nervous like this.
Blaine was about ready to tell Sebastian that he had nothing to worry about. They were kids and as far as he was concerned? Sebastian more than made up for the quote unquote unforgivable mistakes he made at the beginning and middle of their friendship. Why would he hold those things against him now? It was years later and they were both grown men. Letting go of negativity is the only way to truly survive in life. Somethings might be a hell of a lot harder to release than others but Sebastian’s ‘crimes’? They didn’t earn him a life sentence as villain in Blaine’s world.
Nothing but silence and his wallpaper when Blaine pulled the phone from his ear after wondering if Sebastian really did hang up on him. That’d be a yes. The rest of the ride was spent in silence with Blaine’s thumb hovering over Sebastian’s name while debating if he should call back. In the end? He settled for walking into the familiar comfort of the Stonewall. Here–people recognize him. They know his voice and the songs he likes to play on nights where he can steal a an open mic spot. A few wave at him and he waves back. Crimson shoes hook on the rungs of the his stool and his eyes fail to wander too far away from the door as he waits hoping that hang up wasn’t the first sign that Sebastian was going to not show up.
“Shhh. Killer. It’s okay.” Sebastian had no fucking idea what to do, other than to keep holding him. What could he do? What could he answer to that? “You were lonely, Blaine.” He offered, awkwardly, as he kept running his hand up and down his back. “I know you didn’t mean it.” Or at least he had to believe that. Not only because it was what made Blaine, BLAINE, and what had so much attracted him at first, but because if he let himself think about Blaine actually planning to cheat on Kurt with someone else, well, he better not. He tried to focus on knowing how it felt to fuck up, instead, and how he could help Blaine feel better about it. “At least you told him, that’s something, right?” He asked, unsure of what was really best as he’d never been on that end of a relationship. Or in a relationship, honestly. He held him tighter. This was actually the first time he was ever allowed to hold Blaine like that, and he was slowly starting to realize it. They’d hugged, before the proposal fiasco, but it’d been quick and Blaine hadn’t been abandoned on his arms like that.
Sebastian could feel how Blaine was almost shaking against him and it broke the heart most people didn’t think he had. Why was it that after all this time, to see Blaine hurt him like that, hurt him this much? It shouldn’t make as much sense as it did. He kept holding Blaine until he started to come down from his panic, and relax even if slowly, in his arms. Sebastian hadn’t noticed how thinner he looked until Blaine pulled back and he got to actually look him on the face properly. He shook his head. “It’s fine killer. Just wait here for a minute, I’m gonna get you some water, alright? Bathroom’s to the right if you want it.” He pointed out, nodding towards the bathroom door, before gently detaching from Blaine, and getting up. He stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned back around to him. “Don’t go anywhere.” He asked, again, before making his way upstairs, quickly. He hoped Blaine would listen to him, but he put it off his mind for a moment, as he made it to his bedroom. The guy he’d been sleeping with was still knocked out on his bed and Sebastian patted his ankle as he started to gather up his things. “Wake up, sexy. I need you out.” He patted him again as the boy started to grumble and threw the boy’s phone and wallet besides him. “I’ve got a friend over, time to go.” He said, as the other finally looked up at him, frowning. He shrugged. “Can always find me by the bar again.” He told him, before leaving, the door open as he passed through it so he could make his way downstairs again, to the kitchen this time, to get Blaine some water.
“Let me know if you want something stronger.” He said, as he walked back into the living room, a glass of cold water in hand, hoping to find Blaine in the couch.
“Nothing’s okay,” he slowly shook his head and balled up one fist to try some useless attempt at drying his face. “Nothing’s fine and nothing’s okay. I’m not sure if anything will ever be OKAY again.” A shift of positions and Sebastian stood up from the couch–watery hazel eyes blinked clear after a few tries. Blaine watched as Sebastian disappeared out of the room. A quiet groan parted his lips as both elbows were pressed against his upper thighs. Palms cupped the top of his head and he stared between his bended knees at the floor wondering why the hell he thought it was okay to do this to Sebastian. Of all people. Sebastian was his friend, yes. But he knew their history–one that never was, yet was so so close to being something much different–and knew that coming here to break down over making the biggest mistake of his life with someone else was probably akin to a slap in the face. He might be thick about a lot of things that pass him by. Blaine knows that about himself. Not even he could miss where this might be unfair for him to rely on Sebastian to get him through this. Not might be. It was. Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to get up and leave. Even if the thought quickly crossed his mind while he sat there waiting.
Hearing the other drawing close again–Blaine straightened up. If that’s what you could call it. More like folded into himself while pretending he was sitting fully upright. Limbs moved–wrapped around his middle–and he reached for the water with a look of gratitude. “Thank you.” The other hand wrapped gently–so careful that it seemed Blaine thought Sebastian was made from hollow bones that were far too delicate and could break at the slightest touch. He didn’t want him leaving again. Not with the thoughts in his head being plugged up by the other’s presence. He didn’t want them flooding back in. “Please sit down,” he begged up at him–red faced and eyebrows lifted like he could beckon him in with the expression alone. “Sit down and don’t go. Water’s fine. I’m not sure if anything harder’s a good idea. Not LIKE THIS.” What was he supposed to say from here? I know I messed up. I ruined everything. I’ll never be the same again. Neither will he. And it’s all my fault. The words were on the tip of his tongue but he bit them back and swallowed the aftertaste with more water. “It’s all..over. I think. I’m not sure. But. I think so..” And there came the caving in of his chest again. A buckling of his belly and he sat the glass on the table near the couch before palming at his face to hide the crease forming between his brows. Couple of tattered deep breaths later–his fingers dropped with his gaze into his lap.
“I’m sorry… I don’t know why I thought laying this on you was a good idea,” he apologizes because that’s how he’s wired. “You’re just–the only one who I wanted to go to.”
It was a lot more difficult to balance a tray of cookies and knock on a door than Jane anticipated. Maybe she went a little overboard in baking, but she still felt awful about everything that happened with Blaine and her leaving Dalton and going to the New Directions. Even with the teams combined now anyway, Jane felt like she had a lot to make up for – a lot to apologize for. Especially to the man who put so much on the line for her, believed in her and even, dare she say, inspired her to keep strong.
Knocking was not going to work and so she gently kicked the door to his office, clearing her throat. “Mr. Anderson? it’s me – Jane Hayward. I brought you some cookies and… some milk as long as I don’t drop it.”
The clack of keyboard keys and Harry Connick Jr.’s voice filled the room that was turned into a makeshift office for him to use. Boxes of supplies he picked up and hadn’t put away yet were scattered at the foot of his desk. His lunch sat untouched beside his elbow. Only a half cup of coffee held his attention. The machine he bought perched carefully on the edge of the windowsill. Quite honestly, the disarray was unlike him. Half moved in, half digging out of boxes for what he needed. Either he was an unorganized person or–his heart just wasn’t quite ready to accept that the place he loved most was now ash and memories.
Hearing the knock–Blaine’s fingers lifted from the keyboard and any tiredness was gone before the door opened. “Jane! Hi!” Bright hazel met Jane before he noticed her situation and his heart simultaneously melted while he sprang up out of his chair. “Let me help. Oh my god. Did you do all of this? You seriously didn’t have to–,” he paused at the smell and felt his stomach rumble. Flashing her a thankful grin–he nodded at the chair next to his desk. “These smell really good. You HAVE to come try some with me??”
pianokeysandbowties 