Hands gripped firmly around the band of his leather designer schoolbag, Kurt anxiously eyed the way leading up to his final destination; teeth sinking down into his bottom lip before deciding to take a deep breath as he started the eerily quiet walk towards the popular restaurant’s main entrance.
He knew he was probably being silly– that Karofsky couldn’t possibly be having a stakeout at Breadstix at his expense just to have another go at him outside of his usual bullying hours; not during the height of the football season. And yet, here he was, terrified and anxious all the same, his heart permanently stuck in his throat yet determined to make it inside as he knew Blaine would be waiting for him; his head held high and keeping strong for the both of them as Blaine had promised him this was no longer going to be a lone battle.
Pushing the doors open, Kurt couldn’t help but feel anything but relieved; a newly bubbling sense of excitement rapidly extinguishing any anxiety still left festering inside of him as he watched his new Warbler friend quickly make his way toward him. “Hi,” he greeted him, his voice almost breathless despite definitely not just having engaged in any form of high level physical activity. "It’s good to see you, too.“ His lips curved up into a gentle smile as he was shortly met with the other’s excitement regarding his earlier promise. If only. “There’s… definitely free breadsticks.”
Blaine’s head tilted when he, finally, took a good look at his new friend. After hearing about his day and how stressful it was, he needed to check to see if Kurt was alright. Since their meeting, that had been his main goal. Every day. To be there to make sure Kurt was okay and knew he had someone on his side that wasn’t a fair weather friend but one who planned on staying for the long haul. Regardless of what that “long haul” would bring? Blaine was going to be there to help pull it along. No if’s, and’s, or but’s.
A quizzitive gaze read back and forth over Kurt’s. After the initial excitement at seeing him again, making sure he was okay was precisely what Blaine did. Kurt’s rather quick breaths caught his attention. The way his dark eyebrows burrowed together and made a crease of concern appear between them hinted that Blaine was wondering why Kurt was so breathless. Did he jog inside? Or was there more to it than that? Was he relieved that Blaine was actually there? If the other had doubts that he would show up, that was the last thing he wanted.
“You, um, weren’t worried that I wouldn’t show up, were you?” He wondered if that was it and the quesion came with a gente curiosity. Meanwhile, he waited for Kurt to lead them to the fabled table–his smile returning as he brushed his shoulder against Kurt’s. “Come on. Anyone would have to be crazy to stand you up,” he tried to get another smile out of the boy by laughing quietly, “And as far as I know? I’m not crazy.”
[Text – Blaine] What could you have possibly done that was so bad? [Text – Blaine] Talking is the last thing you should do [Text – Blaine] Not at all, but I do think you need to get out of this funk. You need to get out, let your hair down, forget about things for a while….
( mssg » sebastian | sent ) I accused him of doing something that he’d never do. I’ve just been holding way too much in lately and it all came out at the worst possible time in the worst way. ( mssg » sebastian | sent ) Are you sure? Because I feel like I should. ( mssg » sebastian | sent ) You’re right. I do. Before I drive myself and everyone around me crazy.
( mssg » jan | sent ) Who’s hair gel are you talking about? I can promise you that mine is competely safe. In spite of what some rumors may say.
(delayed until after next text)
( mssg » jan |sent ) Wait! So? That being meant for Rachel now has me even more confused. First.. Are you talking about my hair gel? Second, but most curious and confusing… Why are you only seeing out of one eye?
( mssg » blaine | sent ) I don’t think he was really named after anyone, actually. ( mssg » blaine | sent ) If I didn’t know better, I’d almost start to think you a little jealous. 😉 ( mssg » blaine | sent ) Rest assured, we kind of have this mutual agreement. He doesn’t spill any of our deepest darkest secrets up on his blog and I don’t tell anyone about his apparently ongoing obsession with The Notebook. ( mssg » blaine | sent ) If only I hadn’t already told Rachel.
( mssg » kurt | sent ) Jealous?? No way! At least if I have two arms and great pancake making skills to offer you. ( mssg » kurt | sent ) Which is one arm and not cereal out of the box for breakfast more than he could ever give. So! I’ve got that going for me if nothing else! ( mssg » kurt | sent ) I’m glad you made your pact with Bruce. Do you trust him to hold up to his end of the deal? ( mssg » kurt | sent ) Wait! You told Rachel?! How did I not hear about this if she knows? That’s more mindblowing than half torso Bruce in a shady chest under the bed!
// Hey, loves! I wanted to take a minute while I’m a little more conscious to let you all know that my surgery went “textbook” according to my doctor. I’m sore but I’m managing with pain medication and rest. It’s just been making me super sleepy and unable to focus. I cut back a bit on the dosage tomorrow so I hope to be a little more functional and get some replies out. Thank you all so much for all of your notes, check-ins, and thoughts. I really do love you all!
( mssg » blaine | sent ) Okay. I believe you. ( mssg » blaine | sent ) Marc Jacobs. ( mssg » blaine | sent ) I guess I’ll be seeing you at Breadstix. 🙂
( mssg » kurt | sent ) Sailing. ( mssg » kurt | sent ) See you at Breadstix! 🙂
Getting a chance to see Kurt in person for the first time since Kurt’s charming but failed attempt to be the next James Bond was something Blaine looked forward to since Kurt left the private school. Their conversation struck a chord deep inside the Warbler for more reasons than he skimmed over for Kurt to know that he understood what he was going through perfectly because he’d been there. Blaine quickly found himself wanting to be a friend who could offer that understanding. Kurt, obviously, needed it. No one should feel alone as the lost look on the boy’s face that made Blaine’s heart ache proved Kurt was. Well. Not anymore. And never again if Blaine had anything to say or do about it.
Settled into the small waiting area just inside the restaurant doors–Blaine plucked at the hem of his peacoat sleeve and waited for the other boy to show up. His chin was tucked into a dark burgundy scarf and a quiet hum filled the silence, except for the conversations of people coming and going, with a melody he made up as he went along. When the door opened–curious hazel eyes glanced up and as soon as he caught sight of who he was waiting for? Blaine stood up and brushed his hands together, smiling wide as he caught his attention.
“Hey! Kurt. It’s so good to see you,” he moved to clasp Kurt’s shoulder out of habit (Warblers, sheesh) but seemed to catch himself and waved towards the dining area with a semi-apologetic sidelong tug of the corner of his mouth. “So, do I get to see the secret table? I’ve been looking forward to it the entire drive,” he teased lightly, “Tell me it’s free. Or I’ll be heartbroken??”
Blaine was visibly shaking–hands constantly wringing together as he stood staring down at the body laid out on the floor. Unable to look away, he shook his head and tried to step around her like he was told to do. A stumbling attempt but he caught up to Quinn blindly, gaze locked behind his shoulder now. That was his problem. ‘Step around it.’ Sure, this wasn’t the first corpse he’s seen. Living in this nightmare–any time they stepped out of the camp–it was impossible not to see the broken shells of people littering the city or town or what felt like EVERYWHERE you looked. Sometimes he could focus on the task at hand long enough to only get queasy or not feel anything at all (a rarity..but it happened a couple times?). Others? Others were like now. It’d be so much easier if he could be like Quinn. Think of them as ‘it’ and they cease to be a reason to give a second thought past the mission and what was truly important. He was trying. He just..couldn’t. That level of disconnect wasn’t in his reach yet.
“She looks like someone..” He couldn’t bring himself to say who. “I need to get out of here.”
When Sebastian got the text, he somehow already knew. Blaine wouldn’t be texting him to meet up and talk if the news were good. If he had anything to say close to what Sebastian had longed for for almost two years now, he’d be asking him out. Not to the coffee place to have a conversation. Sebastian wasn’t mad. Not really. Hoping Blaine would actually leave Kurt for him had been a stretch by any means. He’d been awfully surprised just by the simple fact Blaine had called him at all, the first time. And then when they’d first kissed… Even his private fears that Blaine would be thrown off once their clothes were shed had been unfounded, and suddenly when he woke up next to a head full of curls, Sebastian felt like all the air had been knocked out of him, and he just didn’t care. I’m lucky. He was lucky it had happened at all. After everything, he hadn’t even hoped Blaine would go back to SPEAKING to him, much less…
A couple months were all they’d had before Blaine’s conscience got too much for him to handle sanely. Sebastian had been understanding, of course. He always was, with Blaine. He knew his place on Blaine’s life from the start. Blaine had always been clear on that. But then- Blaine had said he would try and TALK to Kurt. That things weren’t working out with them either way, and Sebastian felt like he didn’t have lungs anymore. His blood pumping so loud in his ears all nigh long afterwards that he spent it awake staring at the ceiling and breathing in big gasps, his gaze staring into the dark with some sense of wonder. He’d tried to ground himself again afterwards, remember this was Blaine and Kurt they were talking about, and that Blaine had never been his to claim, in the first place, no matter how it’d felt when they’d first met. It was out of his endless affection for the boy in front of him that the gentle response came. The kiss on the cheek as a warm goodbye, all he could do not to mouth Blaine’s lips and kiss him so hard he could start breathing again, swallowing the air from Blaine’s chest. But he hadn’t. He wouldn’t. He was a step from the door, when the hand closed around the bend of his elbow. He blinked, surprised. The words had gone unnoticed to him, in his turmoil, and he panted lightly as he looked at Blaine in confusion. Sebastian sighed, averting his eyes so he wouldn’t show at that soft beg. He licked over his dry lips, still tingling to claim Blaine’s, and breathed out tiredly. “Blaine… I-” He glanced back at him, lips pressed in a line. “Sure. What do you need, killer?” His defeated tone weighting on his tongue. Truth was that no matter how many times Blaine yanked at his leash, Sebastian would go to him again and again, because just as he had nonchalantly professed when they’d first met, whatever scraps Blaine was willing to give him, he’d always be eager to have. He couldn’t help himself.
I’m breaking him. I’m breaking him and this is all my fault. I shouldn’t have let things go the way they did. I shouldn’t have done this.. But, God, there wasn’t a moment inside of those months he shared with Sebastian that he didn’t need. Or want. Want? No, want wasn’t close enough of a word to use. Crave, ache for, cling to, cherish. Those fit better. Sebastian was his weakness as much as he wouldn’t agree because Blaine knew that doing what he did–choosing who he chose–gave Sebastian absolutely no proof of that claim. There wasn’t anything he could do to prove it to Sebastian either. Other than stand there inside the cafe not caring about the world around them. Or if anyone was watching. And utterly beg with everything inside of him for Sebastian to not walk out the door and leave. A voice inside of Blaine’s head had thoroughly convinced him that it might be the last time he ever saw Sebastian again after this. The lump in his throat said he didn’t have the willpower to let that happen. It’d be better for Sebastian, and maybe himself, if he could. Sebastian deserved so much better than him and the pain he was putting him through. Push come to shove, however? He wouldn’t be able to let him go without making sure this wouldn’t be their end. As much of a weakness Sebastian was? He was also so so much of a reason to have strength too. Even when he felt like he had none? Sebastian was there to show him he did. Yet, here they were. Broken. Because he just couldn’t…let someone else go. It was maddening to himself. To keep going in this endless circle back to that same someone else. God only knew how much worse it was for the man standing here so willing to deflate and give in because Blaine was asking him to.
“I know what that kiss was. I know what’s going to happen. Don’t?” A goodbye. That’swhat that was because he could feel it radiating from Sebastian. Two people can’t share what they share and not know what was happening inside the other. If he was right about that? Then Sebastian could certainly feel how desperate he felt. How panicked that they were done done. “Please don’t hate me,” the words were blurted out before Blaine could twist them into something less selfish, “I’m so scared I just ruined us. I know it’s greedy and horrible and makes me a terrible person but I can’t just not see you again ever.” His grip on Sebastian’s elbow flexed, tightened and held on. Tears filled his eyes for the third time today and the muscles in his neck could be seen forcing him to remember how to swallow. “I don’t regret what we..,” words fell into silence as his voice finally echoed back to him and he heard what he was saying and realized where this was heading. “Can we go somewhere? Not here. Please?” What the hell did he just ask that for? Because he’d do anything for five more minutes if those five more minutes were the only ones he was going to get by his own doing.
Elliott let Blaine tug him along, dimly aware of his state of dress – but that was in the back of his mind if Elliott where to be perfectly honest. He had far more pressing issues to be concerning himself with.
“I know – I know he’s a good person Blaine.” And Elliott thanked his lucky stars to get friends like he had, Kurt and Dani most of all.. He loved them with all his heart; that’s why he was so God damn SCARED of how they’d all react.
Elliott sat on the sofa with a little gap between him and Blaine, sitting on one of his feet so he could face Blaine while they talked. He moved his hand too, entwining their fingers so he wouldn’t let go. God knows Elliott needed the contact.
“I don’t mean hide it…I’ve done enough hiding in my life Blaine, never again.” And the way Elliott said it, the fire behind his words – it was clearly something he was passionate about. No more lies, no more being in the closet. He came to New York promising himself he’d be out and proud about everything, and by hell was he going to stick to that.
“I just need to work out how to tell him, you know? Because I don’t want him to get the wrong idea about how we happened. Whatever we are. It’ll upset him a lot and I don’t want to make it any worse for him.”
Blaine covered the entwined sets of their fingers with his free hand and gave the back of Elliott’s a firm squeeze with the edge of his palm. Unsure of everything that was going on between the two of them, he took in a breath and tilted his head trying to stress his point with a lift of his brows.
“You know. We don’t have to rush anything. I mean–we can figure out what we are before we talk about it to anybody else. I’m all for talking to whoever you want to. I don’t like hiding things either and that’s not what I was asking you to do..”
“All I mean is,” he pulled his shoulders up, “Why hurry? Maybe it’d be nice to just have this for a few days, let the idea settle in to us before we add in the drama that we both know is bound to happen.” Whether he liked it or not–whether it was right or not? He loved his friends dearly, there was no question about that.
Overreacting was just part of who they were. He wasn’t unguilty of doing it himself. Sometimes. “I guess a part of me is greedy to say I’d at least like a little time having something be peaceful and uncomplicated for once..”
Did that make any sense? God, he hoped so. Leaning in, he tucked the bridge of his nose against Elliott’s shoulder and stared down into the shadows between the both of them. “It’s up to you, though. We can work out the how to tell them part along the way?”
Sam shoved his phone into the pocket of his hoodie, very happy that Blaine was coming to pick him up. For the life of him he didn’t know how else he would have gotten home. He might be drunk but even he understood he would probably had gotten lost if he had really done as he texted to Blaine, walk home. Making his way to the kitchen he took one of the red plastic cups and filled it with water when he vaguely remembered something from one of the messages Blaine had send him.. water was good. So he figured he drink some.
He sat down on top of the counter and waited for Blaine to come pick him up. He frowned, taking his phone out of his pocket and looked at the messages he send his best friend. Oh shoot, that first one.. hopefully he could convince Blaine it was just him being really drunk that made him send a message like that. He soon forgot about his worry when he heard someone call his name. Looking up he grinned, waving at Blaine when he spotted him. “Yo, over here!” he let himself slide of the counter top and stood on his feet, leaning against the counter to keep his balance. “Hello,” he still waved while Blaine got closer.
There he was! Missing Sam sitting on top of the counter was impossible. Maybe because of the blond hair. Or the fact he was towering above everyone else from his chosen seating arrangement. Or..maybe because he was just Sam and finding him was the only reason Blaine was here to begin with. You know. Yeah. That’s all. No other reason. Definitely not the text message that Sam was trying to figure out a way to convince him was completely harmless drunken banter and nothing more. Of course it was, they both knew Sam wouldn’t actually check out his butt, right? And MOST definitely not the fact that Blaine knew he was on a single sided track of falling for his best friend. One that’d end up with him getting slammed face first by the freaking bullet train if he didn’t get over it.
Nope. None of those reasons. Only because he found who he was looking for and it was time to get Sam home to sleep off his current state and avoid getting in trouble for stumbling through the door at his own house. A soft chuckle lit him up as he approached. “Hey, Sam,” he called out and waved back glad that Sam landed on both feet and didn’t topple over. “You look like you had a great night. Um..” An arm was slid around Sam’s middle to offer support and he prepared to steer Sam through the house if needed. “Ready to get out of here?”
pianokeysandbowties 