Rachel quietly moved through her room, looking for something to wear, feeling a little more energised than she had been when she’d left school earlier that day. “Really? You Warblers always seem to have perfectly cool composures whenever I’ve seen you all,” she told him with a grin, picking out her favourite carousel horse sweater and laying flat on her bed, rolling her eyes at her next comment. “Very funny, Blaine Warbler,” she added with a roll of her eyes, happy to take it all in jest, after all, it was a lot better than the humiliation that she’d faced at school that day. Walking around the hallways covered in another person’s vomit tended to give a girl the wrong sort of attention.
Placing her phone on the bed, she flicked it onto loudspeaker as she quickly got herself changed into something a little more suitable for a coffee date at the Lima Bean. “Oh god yes, I mean, I didn’t even want to throw a party in the first place, talk about peer pressure,” she laughed as she tugged her shirt over her head, swapping it for her sweater, “What about you though? You were hitting things pretty hard that night too,”
Coffee in hand, Blaine stepped over to the bar to doctor up his medium drip keeping himself out of people’s way so he could continue to talk and not be a bother. Embarrassedly laughing in spite of himself, his nose crinkled at the memory of Rachel’s Party The Day After. “I’m surprised you didn’t hear about it. I woke up in Kurt’s bed not knowing where the heck I was.” Oh God that was a painfully weird way to start the day. Only having met Burt a few other times before–in passing, he was pretty sure that was the most awkward way he ever greeted any of his friends parents. Completely unaware that he was even talking to someone at first before he threw himself back under a pillow and tried to sink away from the throbbing in his head. The morning just went downhill from there.
“I don’t think the headache stopped until the next day. And I made Kurt’s Dad super awkward when I, finally, came downstairs. I’m sure it looked awful since he barely knows me. He didn’t even know I was there. I don’t think I ever apologized so hard in my life once I realized he was the one who woke me up.” God, he hoped Burt Hummel didn’t think horribly of him after that. Kurt reassured him he didn’t. Blaine hoped that was the case.. Now that he had his coffee perfectly made, the Warbler stole a table by the window so they would have one once Rachel got there. “That mess aside? It was a great night, though. I really had a good time. Hope you did, too?”
When they first met, Barry wasn’t sure where this would go. Would it lead to something more than just friendship? Would they remain as just friends? The speedster wasn’t sure, but he had taken the leap. And here they were, Barry was more than happy, it was amazing, and it seemed like a dream sometimes. A dream among the nightmares he would sometimes experience, ones he’s yet to completely tell Blaine about. That’s where his guilt laid, the other didn’t know he was the Flash, didn’t know the dangers that came with being with Barry. At first he believed it was merely paranoia, nothing more, and nothings less. He was wrong. Blaine was in danger, and Barry would do anything in his power to protect him. Even from himself. It’s the last thing he wanted. To be separated from the man he loved.
Hearing his voice, it was both soothing, and painful. If he carried this out, this might be the last time he would hear. Barry will no longer wake up to the sound of his voice. The sounds of his laughter, his ridiculous enthusiasm when it came to disco music, or when he sang. He would never get the chance to fall down on one knee, and ask that question he wanted to for the past few months. It made his heart ache in such a painful manner, this was the… right choice. Regardless of how devastated Blaine might be, he deserved so much more than the CSI could give. He’d just bring him down, this amazing sunshine, and he can’t let that happen. It was hard to look up at him, eyes lingering on his clasped hands, fidgeting with his fingers.”Blaine,” I’m sorry, “I’m… moving back, to my old place.” There he said it out loud.Saying the words didn’t make it any easier, and the regret he felt inside just seemed to intensified.
He was about to break his heart, and he didn’t warrant such a thing. Blaine… was such a selfless person, kind, and sweet. Barry didn’t deserve him. “I…Blaine, I love you, but I have to do this,” the urge to tell him the truth, to be honest, it was so overwhelming. Just tell him, tell him all he needed to know. The reason for the nightmares, the reason why sometimes it seemed like he was just drowning in guilt. Be open for once. Green eyes met those indescribable hazel ones again, this was much harder than he originally believed. Could he truly go through with it? “I’m not good for you, Blaine, I’ll bring you down, and you don’t deserve that. You’re a brilliant star, you deserve better.”
”Blaine. I’m… moving back, to my old place.”
He didn’t just hear what he thought he heard.. Did he? Denial was the first sensical thing that could follow hearing something so sudden. So out of the blue that nothing in his world could have lead him to even think that he’d ever hear Barry say anything like that to him. There’s a trust between them. One that ran deep and strong and unbreakable. Because that’s what you put into someone when you hand them your heart. Your devotion. Your world. You let them become your world because the one that was once yours without them was always missing something. That something was them. All along it was them.
So.. You give everything you are to that person (your hopes, your dreams, your plans for the future..cause they’re a part of you and all of that) and they give everything back. Once you hold everything they are in the palm of your hand? You don’t just drop them. They don’t drop you either. They can’t. You don’t wake up one day and stop caring about them. You don’t kiss them goodbye on their way to work like all the other mornings you’ve shared over the years then welcome them home just to say goodbye and snuff that love out like a burnt up match.
You don’t DO that.
That’s why.. The words hit him with the sheer force of an impact so brutally hard that felt like he’d thrown himself in front of a freight train and tried to stop it dead on the tracks. They stole his breath, caved in his throat and he was pretty sure injected themselves into his veins and flooded them with a numb ache. A sensation he never thought existed because of the sheer ridiculousness of until he heard what he never thought he’d ear. How can numb possibly hurt? Well.. It can..and Blaine felt it from head to toe.
“Please don’t keep talking.. Please, stop..” His voice was weak enough that Barry could talk over it easily. Did he even give his tongue room enough to actually speak that? Or did he just think it? He must’ve just thought it. Cause Barry was telling him that he loved him and this was for his own good. Blaine had no idea what good was. Not like this. Not as of ten seconds ago. Cause his good was gone and he was still racing to catch his breath and try to wrap his head around what was happening. There were tears in his eyes. He felt them. Tears and more tears and he couldn’t hold them in because he couldn’t make anything work. Fingertips pressed into the hollows of his eyes, blocking Barry and the world and what was happening from view as he tried to wipe them away and hide. “Don’t do this to us.” He had to beg between the sides of his hands while there was a fraction of an us to beg for. “I’ll do whatever it takes to make you realize that you are good for me. You always have been. I’m sorry I didn’t do enough to show you before.” His fingers spread open and round, watery eyes stared down at him. “I love you and I need you to love me back..and stay. Please?”
Of course he’d hate it. He knew Blaine was going to hate it. Sebastian was usually blunt and straight to the point even with Blaine who could react quite badly, but for fucks sake he had to lie about this outfit being hotter. It was a stupid white lie so that he’d wear it without a fit but it seems Blaine has seen through the bullshit once again. Of course the thing was hideous but Blaine had agreed to do this fashion show. If he wasn’t going to do it the right way than what the hell was he going to tell the designer? Sebastian feels the headache coming on from just thinking about the mess alone that is Blaine having a diva meltdown and him having to go talk to her.
Green hues having a fed up glare in them, he hangs the outfit on the small silver rack of clothing and rolls his eyes. Why, despite his behavior, did Sebastian always want to continue pleasing him and assisting him? He could quit right now if he wanted but the thing is – he didn’t want to! It was a confusing mental war he had with himself every day. Plus of course he needed the money. Finally, arms cross against his chest and he raises an eyebrow. ❝But it was made custom for you. She can’t just put it on a fucking model and call it good. This is a fashion show, Mr. Anderson — to showcase her WORK. You’ve signed a contract agreeing to go out there wearing her clothes so its probably a good idea to wear the damn thing even if she did change it last minute.❞
Blaine can feel his pulse picking up the longer Sebastian insists that he put on the hot mess hanging from his hand. There was absolutely no amount of begging and pleading or going the opposite route with trying to use some tough love or logic that was going to change his mind. The press would have a field day with comments about what he looked like. His fans will think he’s on drugs or had some sort of mental fashion breakdown. AND that barely touches on the thousands of comments that will be waiting for him all over social media. Not that he cares what people say… Not at all. Oh God, he does Read one horrible review of yourself and you’ll never want to do it again. Or you’ll become something else to make sure that feeling never repeats itself.
Sebastian is doing his best to convince him to commit career suicide (okay, he’ll still wake up famous tomorrow but he’s getting worked up and this is getting worse by the minute) and he isn’t having anything of it. Long, thin fingers snap up with his palm facing his assistant. Both brows freeze in place as high up on his forehead as they can. Fire blazes behind his golden hazel eyes and ALLLL over his face is one word. N o. “If you bring that thing closer, I swear to God, I’ll find some scissors and turn that back into the Kleenex it was obviously made out of.” His fingers curl towards his palm and then both hands twist into tight fists shoved against hip bones barely covered by the waistband of his leather pants and belt. “Go tell her to find a model. Throw it in the trash where it belongs. Or…,” he decides..even better, “If she wants her entertainment to stick around and not tell her to go to hell? Don’t ask them to publically humiliate themselves or..they–aka I–am out of this hell.” And now we are entering Code Red. So says the tell tale biting of his bottom lip that warns..this is about to get even more UGLY.
He can’t recall the last time he met a man so care free. No matter how young he can’t help but see traces of burden on too many shoulders. Even the loud, obnoxious children he could roll his eyes at only behave as such because their parents don’t listen. A little boy repeats the word ‘mum’ ten times rapidly and she still doesn’t look up from her phone to address him. In anyone there were small signs to anxieties or other stress, frustration, possibly even fear. No one was without their burdens, their demons.
This man would surely be the be the same as anyone else but in this moment he was bright and calm and going on about nothing but how much he loved dogs. His smile becomes infectious, brightening Michael’s own as he watches and listens. “This is my second walk with her but her owner’s building is just down the block from mine, only local one that allows pets so it’s full of them. If you ever feel like borrowing a dog it’s definitely the place to go.” He explains lightly, despite his motives being slightly less innocent than that. He liked the animals, truly. Sweet things sometimes frustrating but all simply needed to be taught and loved on. He wishes from time to time that he could have one of his own but when walking as many animals as he was and still on the street at night it didn’t take a genius to know that he couldn’t afford another mouth to feed.
“Where is this place and can I get an apartment there,” he joked lightly as the furry ball of sweetness climbed up onto his lap. Blaine let her stay there because..how could you chase her away if you have any sort of soul? Fur covered pants weren’t really much of a bother. Not when it was the small price to pay for getting a lap full of pure, simple dog love. He was pretty sure he had a lint roller somewhere at the theatre. If not? Then some tape would do. “Kidding. I don’t think I can up and move but wow that is a temptation that’s hard to resist.”
The cold press of a nose against his neck drew his attention to the side. Apple’s nuzzle was beyond words but his facial expression said it all. Matching her puppy-eyed stare with one of his own–Blaine melted and would’ve handed his soul over to the tiny cutie if she asked for it. The tip of his finger scratched the bridge of her muzzle and she was back in his lap, tail wagging and her stupid, giddy face stared up at Michael in perfect unison with Blaine’s gaze returning back up at him. Both sets of wide eyes read across Michael’s expression. Blaine only just tuning into the fact he was probably holding him up long past the polite fuss any dog lover would welcome being given to their baby. And she wasn’t even his to want it for. Oh boy.
“I’m sorry. Got caught up..,” his nose wrinkled from a cringe, “I’m keeping you, aren’t I?” His smile wobbled on the oops! side of embarrassment before he carefully started to uncross his legs so he could stand up and let the poor man escape if he needed to.
Barely one sip from his coffee and Blaine was forced to watch helplessly as his cup went flying through the air and collided against the sidewalk. No amount of fumbling to catch up to in with the stupid hope that he could Neo it out of the air like some Matrix superhero was going to save him from the inevitable. The lid went flying up, coffee defied any logic of gravity and was now soaking the bottom legs of his navy blue dress pants and the bare ankles sticking out above the lips of his very grossly soaked brown leather loafers.
And the guy who knocked it out of his hand via slamming against his elbow was looking at HIM like HE was the devil!
“Sorry..,” Blaine’s apology was as low and fake as the conviction he tried to pack behind the word yet failed to. He didn’t take his gaze off the spilled contents of his cup to deliver it either.. His day barely started and this is how it was going to go. He was half-tempted to go back home and try to start over. Or at least change his pants and shoes?? Until he heard a voice that sounded familiar coming up beside him. Easy come, easy go.
Michael..?
A ray of sunshine broke through his flustered, scrunched together expression. The sight of the man he’d met just days ago brightened his eyes, smoothed out his forehead and his smile was back with a vengeance. “Oh..hey..hi. I..,” he motioned to the mess on the ground and pouted right before a laugh turned it cheerful. “I hope your day is going better than mine..?”
sebastian felt like his lips were duct-taped, and somewhere inside his head, something was screaming, but nothing ever came out. all those little things he might had wanted to say to the other, running around his head in loops, weren’t even allowed to be thought of most of the time. sebastian couldn’t dwell on them, much less say any of them out loud. anything he said would put an end to this, whatever that was (friendship?). and anything that put an end to having blaine exactly where he was, around him, wasn’t something he was prepared to do or say. after those two years, he still couldn’t believe his luck that blaine would even talk to someone like him. and if THIS, whatever it was, was all he got, then he was thankful.
he’d never been one for half truths, or polite remarks. as blaine well knew from their first up conversation, straight-forward had always been his way. but ever since the whole mess between them had gone down, and blaine had barely even wanted to see him again, sebastian had started lying. something that, contrary to popular belief, he didn’t do unless it was towards authority figures, or for rumor fun. specially not with a smile and a dismissive attitude. but THAT boy. the one that – now – only hit on blaine to make him feel better, and listened, and welcomed him any time he wanted into his door, without expecting anything back, that boy was the boy blaine needed, and to be quite honest, sebastian would have tap-danced naked on wall street if blaine had needed him to. and so he lied. easily and on stride. because that was what their relationship had become the last year. blaine talked, and he lied. it was a derisive routine they liked to follow, and sebastian wasn’t about to break it. because at least it meant blaine was there to be lied TO.
blaine was going to get enough crap from the muppets and their loud, loud, leader, once that blew up, as he knew it would, since none of them could keep their private lives, private. he didn’t need any from him too. blaine needed neutral ground. and sebastian would give it to him, and whatever else that could possibly make this better.
❝no way you know what your booty call style will be forty years from now, killer. i’ll bet five hundred on you staying the hottest of all.’ he winked. he wished he could be his young self meeting blaine THEN. maybe older blaine would like him. at least for a couple of nights. he shook away the stray thought, then smiled at the other. ‘who needs a spank bank when we got THIS?’ he asked, as he found the first captain america movie and put it to play. ‘i can grab us ice cream, if you’re too hungry to wait.’ he proposed. biting the inside of his lip as he saw blaine getting so comfortable in his home.
a twinge of longing in his lungs.
Bare toes peeked out from the edge of the blanket once he finally got it and the pillows he rested back against–sitting with his legs stretched out across the mattress to be as comfy as possible–perfectly in place. Blaine wriggled them back and forth and watched them move instead of looking up immediately. It was a means of grounding himself and battling past the idea that he should leave once and for all. He managed to shut down the afterthought of how long it was proper to stay as soon as stopped. A jumbled brain was what he came here to escape…and he was making a mess out of the attempt at this rate.
A half-hearted laugh, embarrassedly flattered as always though, scrunched the edges of his eyes together as he dared to unglue his eyes from his toes and fix his attention back on Sebastian. “Me? Are you serious? Highly doubtful. I’d take that bet if there was any way to prove it. I mean, we’re going to disagree on who the winner is. I’d say it was you. You’d say it was me. We’d argue. No one would ever get the pay out. Plus? Who gets to be the judge? But…,” he sighed and pulled the covers up to pool around his waist not realizing he’d been fidgeting with the edge of the blanket this entire time until he moved his hands. Of course that nervous habit was stopped the very second he was conscious of it and he took to smoothing out the plush cotton underneath his fingers instead. “Thank you..,” his head bowed in a curt nod.
Then his face went pink and he stuttered for a second, not expecting wank bank to come at him out of the blue. That was Sebastian though! Zipping both of them back to their usual dynamic. As unusual of a friendship as it was, Blaine cherished whatever they were together for that reason above all others. Sebastian could be trusted to drive a wrench into the cogs of a failing machine right before it fell apart. Especially when that machine was Blaine’s brain, wits. Whatever. “I..,” his cheeks puffed right before a woosh of an exasperated breath was blown through puckered lips. “Um. Exactly. Cap provides all of that that you need.” And the boy who could throw around masturbation topics like discussing the weather to his boyfriend a year ago dissolved into a bumbling mess with wank bank. Why? ..Why ask or even think of why? Dangerous path best left untrodden..
“I think I’m okay. With the amount of food we have coming? I should probably wait until after it’s here.” Food seemed like such a far away idea that he completely forgot about til here. Waking up in New York City after what happened, the phone messages, the begging that went unanswered and..the flight home. He’d been numb all day. Eating was the furthest thing from his mind and nothing sounded good anyway. Not even the peanuts that were waiting for him in his seat. Sebastian bringing it up reminded him. Sure, he might be a little hungry now. Maybe starving if he focused on it but he could wait a while longer. “Some more water would be great. Or tea? Tea would be even better. And then maybe you could get comfortable, too? You don’t have to helicopter over me. I promise. I’m not running out the door,” he gave him a crooked smile again and gave the mattress a pat right beside his hip. “And if you stay standing there? I’m going to get a crick in my neck on top of everything. It’s really not fair how tall you are. Have I told you that lately?” It was his attempt to show him he was more okay than he actually was. A joke. A means of making the fretting boy smile. That’s what he needed to see the most.
Just to know that he hadn’t made another colossal mistake.
In Character Social Media
Repost and…
Bold yes or no If yes, fill in after it what sort of posts your muse’s followers could expect Feel free to add URL headcanons, as well as social media I forgot Tag your friends!
Tumblr (y / n): Blaine uses tumblr mostly for following some of his favorite musicians or musicals as well as indulging himself on some fanfiction now and then.
Plus, those showchoir blogs, too!!
Instagram (y / n): Instagram is one of his favorite social media sites. He loves keeping up with friends posts and indulges himself in posting snippets of projects he’s working on. Especially later on in life when more of his friends are busy and/or scattered throughout the states and when he’s becoming more known on Broadway and in the music industry. It’s a great means of keeping in touch with the people who want to know what you’re up to.
Facebook (y / n): Blaine isn’t too into facebook. It’s his least used social media outlet. Mainly uses it to post generic things or say hi to people he’s not overly close to. He’d rather just text or call someone rather than use messenger.
Twitter (y / n): Twitter is another way Blaine keeps up to date with his favorite artists, etc. Doesn’t really use it for his own personal stuff until later on down the road and then it’s mostly tied in with his Instagram posts.
Pinterest (y / n): Doesn’t use it often but has been known to indulge himself on getting ideas for organizing, etc. Now, Dad!Blaine? Pinterest junkie! He’s craft dad extraordinaire to a ‘please hold him back’ level. Think Puppet Master Blaine only with a little kid to entertain. Scary stuff. 😛
Youtube or Twitch (y / n): Blaine uses twitch for game mods but doesn’t really use it for anything else. Youtube? Now and then. Mostly for mindless entertainment purposes.
Others (bold if apply):
Snapchat || MySpace || Reddit || 4Chan || Discord || Skype || Uses Dark Web
A part
of Rachel wondered whether Blaine was just saying these things so she wouldn´t
feel worse about herself. She didn´t want to think that he was lying, but
Blaine was a kind soul who´d never actually call her a burden. She herself,
however, felt like one, because there was nothing she could do to control the
overwhelming grief she was struck by. Losing Finn had felt like the ground
being pulled from under her feet and ever since then she had been falling. Most
of the days she managed to put on a brave face and a smile, but whenever she
came home the façade crumbled rather quickly.
Having
Blaine here was helping though, and Kurt too of course, but he was just as
affected by this like Rachel was and sometimes it helped to hug him, but sometimes
it made things worse.
She
kept her eyes on the tv, focusing on the way he was playing with her hair,
slowly relaxing. The tightness in her chest was slowly dissolving and at his
words she almost smiled. “Mhm…my hair is amazing,” Rachel nodded. “Yours is
pretty nice too, though you do use a bit too much gel,” She then teased.
Alternating between the comb and his fingers running through her hair, Blaine found comfort in the cool, silky strands when their long lengths glided through it. This was better than laying in bed awake, staring at the ceiling and wondering how he was going to piece the two people he loved so deeply back together. Rachel was giving him a way out of his thoughts and she had no clue on how much he appreciated it. He knew her well enough to know she still felt like he was going too far out of his way. She couldn’t be any more wrong. He’d sit here for hours if she’d let him. You know? Between checking in to make sure Kurt was still asleep and not doing exactly what she was saving him from.
Oh God. They were going to be okay. Weren’t they? Somehow. Someway. There was going to come a time where all of them could laugh again without wondering if they should feel guilty about it? How was he supposed to go back to Lima when his heart, mind and soul was stuck right here? Where he was needed most. He made a plan to push his flight back as far as he could as soon as the sun came up.
Seeing a tiny smile from her made his heart skip a beat. That was all he needed to know he was making the right decisions. Lima could stay in Lima. It’d be waiting for him when he decided to go back and that was okay. I’ll figure out the rest later. Grinning lightly, he danced the tips of his fingers across her forehead. Then let the edge of his pointer drag down the bridge of her nose to the very end. Tap, tap. “There’s never enough gel when it comes to my hair. Or is it? Are you saying I should lay off a little, Miss Berry? I think..I mean..maybe I can?”
“It’s pretty gross.” He concedes with a nod. The work he did wasn’t pretty, but his focus was the science. It sounded rather cold, but looking at dead bodies and seeing people made it so much harder to stomach. Later, when all was done, or if he saw the victim alive or their families, then he could empathize. In general though it was all objective. “Vaseline under the nose helps. It’s really the science that I love, and helping catch killers is a pretty good perk. And it’s pretty hard to have a boring day at the office, y’know?”
As Blaine goes on Barry has to admit that he was somewhat confused about the turns Blaine’s life had apparently took but at least he was still pursuing what he loved. “I feel like that’s even more complicated than it sounds, but I’m glad you’re here. Y’know, doing performance and all that. Would’ve sucked to see you of all people give it up.” He replies honestly, smile still warm on his face. “I actually thought about applying to NYADA- congrats for making it, by the way, even though you left I know it’s not easy to get in.” Almost impossible, in fact. Anyone who was accepted was impressive. Blaine always had been talented but most high school talents didn’t make it much farther no matter what the subject was. Barry as glad for him.
“It’s just a lot to take in on a daily basis, I’m sure..” Blaine frowned thoughtfully towards the rim of his glass that a thumbnail was currently toying with the edge of. A brief glance back up at Barry and the downward curve of his lips shifted up into a smile. “I’m glad you’re doing something you enjoy. And to think..? You’re one of the good guys out there catching the bad guys before they do something horrible? I don’t think any other job could be more important. For what it’s worth? I’m really proud of you.”
Finishing off what he’s been up to all this time, Blaine arched a brow at the notion that his life sounded..well..complicated. Thinking about it? Yeah. It sort of was. But it couldn’t be anything compared to what Barry had to deal with on a day to day basis.
“Complicated pretty much sums up these years in the best way possible. But everything seems to be coming together.” About time. Blinking at the mention of NYADA he couldn’t help wondering what that would have looked like. Maybe he would have stuck it out a little easier if they had been there at the same time. What would that have looked like? Even if it was neither here nor there. It was a curious thing to think over. A proud glint lit up his eyes for a moment and his smile made the corners crinkle as it widened. Half-humbled modesty that he hasn’t lost in all these years, half-happy to hear Barry congratulate him because it meant something. More than what the other might know. “Thank you. Even if it didn’t work out? It made getting into Tisch, once I came back here, feel a hell of a lot easier and less nerve wracking that it would have been if it was my first school. So.. Have you been back to Ohio yet? Or..are you one of the ones who escaped and don’t plan on ever going back?”
pianokeysandbowties 