❝ They ALL look like someone. It’s a part of being the undead. ❞
She’s grown too used to the sight of CORPSES lying around by now. They aren’t human in her eyes anymore, and haven’t been since Heaven knows how long. Has managed to detach herself of emotion when it comes to looking at them because what else is she supposed to do ? She’s a regular FIGHTER; goes out every week or two with her team to pick through the d e b r i s and decaying buildings to find something useful, and bringing something as feeble as FEELINGS into it is … messy.
Of course, Quinn u s e d to care. Remembers the FIRST creature she had killed ——— the sound of its skull caving in and the feeling of KNOWING that it had once been properly, fully alive. Once upon a time, it too, had breathed. It had loved and cared for others, and she’d killed it with an old bat she’d found in someone’s basement. Had to be consoled for at least an hour before she could keep going, and that was only because they were SURE they were being followed. Then, when the whole thing with Finn had happened, she’d learned to keep empathy out of it. Caring wasn’t worth the pain.
❝ Come on, we’ll leave through the back exit. There could be something we NEED in the kitchen, and we don’t want to miss that, ❞ she instructs with the words and mind of a calculated leader. ❝ You take up the front, and I’ll take up the back and make sure that that THING’S definitely dead. Just keep walking, okay ? I’m right behind you.
❞
“She looks like my mom.. I don’t even know if she made it or not..”
Blaine walks as he’s told without giving any sort of verbal confirmation that he understood what she was telling him. Moving was more than enough. Eyes glued to the personthing on the floor until he had to step around to continue on. His blood ran cold, fingers that weren’t holding the grip of his gun with a white knuckled tightness balled into a fist at his side.
“I’m sorry. I’m good now. Promise.”
Quinn’s detachment was something someone like him who lacked it envied. The world would be so much easier to take if he could look at it as all a means to an end that didn’t matter what route you took through a sea of bodies and death as long as he came out on the other side okay. Maybe someday. He was trying. Just wasn’t there yet. Steps that felt ten times heavier than any he’s ever taken carry him towards the back. Most important, the kitchen.
“Let’s just get what we need and get out of here,” he squints stopping by the next wall and holding his breath as he steps far enough to glance around it. Noise, repetitive and quick that only he seems to be able to hear. A rapid gush of an echoing wet in his eardrums, heart pounding and blood rushing fast. CLEAR. “I think that might’ve been the only one..” Oh God, he hoped so.. A quick, sharp glance over his shoulder checked to see if she was there. Of course she was. Quinn was a person he trusted beyond trust. That’s why he’s here with her, after all. “Was it dead?” Please tell me it was dead.
enzo.
[Text-Piano man]: Honestly, when it comes to someone that I like I have to find out everything I can about them and you’re the one I want and I hope you know that. Is that a problem? I promise I won’t do anything unless you want me to.
[Text Piano Man]: What if I told you that I’m right outside your house? It turns out that Plush is on tour in New York and well, I couldn’t stay away from you. I hope you don’t mind me showing up like this without asking. Honestly, I couldn’t help myself. I’m never good at staying away from someone I do like. I could leave if you wish.
( mssg » rockstar | sent ) You do? I mean.. I guess that’s what getting to know
( mssg » rockstar | sent ) Wait, sorry I didn’t finish that other text. I was a little surprised by the second one. Are you playing with me? You’re outside my house? I thought you were inviting me over..?
( mssg » rockstar | sent ) Sorry. I’m shocked that you like me enough to find out where I live. Don’t leave. We should have that late night chat, right? I mean. Um. Sure. I’m on my way down. Give me a minute. I’ll be right there.
Rachel knew there was nothing to apologize for. Not
considering the situation they were in, and yet she felt like she had to
apologize, because Blaine was affected by this as much as she was and yet he
found the strength to somehow support her, and Kurt too.
Sometimes Rachel still couldn’t believe that Finn was gone.
They might not have been a couple, and maybe they wouldn’t have become one
again either, but they would have always had a special connection with each
other and it would have worked out one way or another.
That chance had been taken from them though and Rachel
couldn’t deal with that. She held onto Blaine tightly, sobbing into his
shoulder until it felt as if she had no more tears to spend. She sighed,
exhausting taking over as she slumped against him.
“Thank you…” She finally whispered, the answer to something
said minutes ago. “And…maybe.” She couldn’t promise that she´d get out of the
apartment. She had taken two weeks off NYADA, starting when they had all gone
back to Lima to celebrate Finn´s life, but one week was already done and when she
had returned to New York neither her nor Kurt had left the apartment.
Rachel sighed again, pulling back slightly, but still
holding on to Blaine. “Do you…want to make some tea?”
Blaine was doing his best to hold it together for both their sakes and he thought he was doing a pretty good job of it until Rachel started to sob into his shoulder. That’s when he couldn’t hold back. Tears beaded at the corners of shut eyes before they fell into the dark chestnut strands of hair he was nuzzled down into.
Keeping his breathing steady as possible, he traced circles between her shoulders with one hand. Not letting go, not even for a beat, he cried with her as quietly as he could. When she calmed and went still, her weight drew him out of it far enough that the tears came to an end.
“You’re welcome,” his voice was uneven but he nodded taking what he could get as far as his idea that they should all go out. “I’ll take a maybe. A maybe is a lot better than a no.”
Closing his hands over both of hers and leaning back, Blaine rested her palms against his chest letting her feel the warmth there. Thumbs ran back and forth over the edges of her palms. “Yeah. I can do that,” a kiss was pressed to her forehead, “Wait here.”
The heels of his palms dug into the hollows of his eyes as he walked to the kitchen and fought the urge to cry the whole way there. His pieces were glued together flimsily, no way would he be able to do it again before he had to go back to her. Splashing water from the sink up to wash his face before filling the kettle and fixing their mugs just right, he pressed the button and waited. Agonizing minutes later, the kettle shut itself off and he returned to her side of the bed, speaking softly in case she fell asleep. “Tea’s ready.. You sure you don’t want a snack, too?”
Santana was fairly shocked that Blaine didn’t push his point any further. He could be pretty stubborn, but maybe the fear of Santana’s reaction silenced his attempts. Whatever effect she had on him, at least it got his silence. Fighting about Kurt was what got them into this mess — she wasn’t about to go down that same road again. Maybe that showed just how desperate she was to get their friendship back as well. That could be leverage — real proof that Santana cared more than she let off. There were too many times where that got brought to the light. Was she really about to let this be another one?
( mssg » blaine anderson | sent ) Don’t get sappy on me, captain bowtwit. I’m not in the mood. ( mssg » blaine anderson | sent ) We’ll see. ( mssg » blaine anderson | sent ) Don’t get too excited. A conversation can easily man nothing. I mean, do any of us remember anything the leprechaun said while he was in Glee club? Or the jesus freak with pet dreads named after bible characters? Irrelevant. Meet half way, around that park with the coffee stand. You’re buying.
( mssg » santana | sent ) Okay. Sorry. Consider this an official Sap Free Zone. ( mssg » santana | sent ) I’m not letting you give up on me.. No “we’ll see”. ( mssg » santana | sent ) Yeah. No hopes up. Got it. I’ll meet you there around six.
Blaine sat on the bench beside the coffee stand, reading over their last sets of texts while volleying replies back and forth to Rachel. He was pretty sure that his eyebrows were permanently frozen in a shoved together position and his teeth had to let up on his bottom lip soon or they were going to do some damage. No amount of mindless chatter with Miss Berry was going to erase the nervous jitters he had while waiting for Santana to show. Knowing he had one chance to fix what happened between the two of them was wracking his last nerve. Blaine couldn’t bring himself not to try to mend fences. Santana was too important not to give their friendship an effort to save. Regardless of time spent or distance apart, she mattered to him. And they’d all been through too much together to forget that.
blaine stepping back had sebastian’s heart actively throbbing in his chest. so painfully like it only had in those few moments he’d been truly scared. humiliation brewing in his stomach at the thought of what he might have done. had he hurt blaine even more?! he SWORE he’d never lay a hand on him again and yet… his breath didn’t pick up, it stilled, almost impossibly quiet as he felt cold. blaine looked scared and ashamed and sebastian didn’t know what to do with it.
when he finally said it, sebastian’s had SPUN, hard. was that it? he’d kissed him? was it that HORRIBLE to have blaine looking as green as he did? as though the very memory of it made him stomach-sick? and still sebastian couldn’t help but ASK. not with the way the ghost of a memory kept dancing over his sugar sticky lips. not with the way blaine wavered as though… sebastian took a step forward, pupils wide as he waited, eating away at the green in his eyes, with an expectation so painful sebastian wasn’t sure he was still breathing at all. he frowned at the confusing semi answer. didn’t take WHAT? didn’t take it like that? his eyes couldn’t help but trail down to the movement of blaine’s throat and a different kind of warmth settled in his stomach before he forced them back up.
and then… eyelids shot wide. and suddenly it was so quiet, he wondered if he became deaf. bline kept speaking but sebastian couldn’t hear it. yes. yes.YES.
he had kissed blaine anderson and blaine had actually kissed him back. he restarted breathing with a knocking gasp like a punch in the stomach, but there was no pain in his face, only…. bewilderment. blaine had kissed him back. blaine had kissed him back. sebastian had no idea why he looked so embarrassed and to be quite frank, he wasn’t sure he CARED. his ears were still buzzing but he could hear again. the way blaine’s palm rubbed his own neck making his knees weak again.
i let it happen. sebastian moved.
he cared nothing for the strained tone behind blaine’s words. he cared nothing for the hidden meaning of guilt and something else entirely stupid along those lines. he cared nothing for the apology in the dark eyes, the way his mouth tasted like coffee and too much sugar, and his head still felt like sandpaper under his skin. none of it got close to mattering as he fisted his hands on blaine’s shirt, an almost tortured, completely open for once, look of every single moment of longing, pain, and disappointment he’d spent thinking about this. and then he was jerking the other into a tight, desperate, open mouthed kiss. the earth shifted beneath him and sebastian knew he’d never feel fully grounded to it again.
Blaine watched as Sebastian’s eyes shot open wide with a growing knot in his belly he was sure was ten loops thick. The last thing he ever wanted was for Sebastian to think he took advantage of him when Sebastian trusted him to keep him safe. He rambled on, trying to explain himself, but Sebastian’s face was frozen and Blaine felt like he was shrinking by each second under the weight of green eyes that were unblinking, unwavering set inside a face that was the very definition of SHOCK. His palm never left his neck as he tried to figure out what was about to happen.. Would he be kicked out? Did he read this wrong and it might be a good thing?
It had to be a good thing. Blaine wasn’t oblivious to the fact that Sebastian wanted him. Wanted to do what he did in the cab, KISS HIM, for a very long time now. Or so he thought that want was still there. Or Sebastian wouldn’t have done it. Unless it was the alcohol talking and Blaine was too weak to not listen. Tired of looking past the need in Sebastian’s eyes over and over because he had to convince himself that this (whatever this was) shouldn’t happen.
Losing Sebastian wasn’t an option and Blaine wasn’t sure he could risk everything.. Even if he wanted to. So bad. Time and time again. Back into oblivion those notions always went. Back into staring into space, back into forced obliviousness once the real thing wore off. Back to being safe. That’s the dance Blaine shared with Sebastian in his head. A one sided waltz of caution. More times than he cared to count. Too many.
Sebastian moved. Blaine cringed inwardly but on the outside, his lips parted into a tiny, wary smile and he felt his toes curl against tile trying to steady himself.
His shirt went tight around his back when Sebastian’s fist balled it up. This was it. No matter what happened from this moment on, they’d never be the same. Inside Sebastian’s eyes was so much ache that Blaine felt his throat close around the words ‘I’m sorry’ that never came out. Seeing that look would be enough to bring anyone to their knees. But the jerk forward made him stumble a step closer, hazel eyes rounded owlishly–hands reached out to rest against Sebastian’s chest where he felt a racing pulse that matched his. His breathing stopped. Their mouths connected. He felt Sebastian pour out utter desperation into him and Blaine swallowed it down with a quiet groan. Only to feel himself and all his willpower shatter to nothing. So much for his careful distance. It was gone as Blaine caved, inched upwards for more and gave every shred of want and need right back, too gone to hold it in anymore.
text — b. anderson ; A little birdie tells me you were recently appointed the new Rachel. text — b. anderson ; Congratulations.
( mssg » jesse | sent ) Wow! That birdie gets the news out fast. I was just told the day before yesterday. I can’t believe it’s reached you already.. ( mssg » jesse | sent ) Thank you, Jesse. Mind if I ask where you heard if from? I’m too curious not to.
* MUSE’S WORST TRAITS.
bold that which applies italic verse or timeline dependent
pianokeysandbowties 