“Okay.” His words were quiet and he had a slightly uncomfortable smile on his face. Walking through to the living room his breathing was shallow as his fingers ran across the couch. “Oh, a water’s fine. Thanks.” Sebastian appreciated it. He only wished he could get rid of this awkwardness. In fact, he couldn’t stand it. How did someone like Sebastian fucking Smythe get reduced to someone who wasn’t open to talk. “Actually no. Let’s just sit down and talk. No distractions. Okay?” he asked him.
He was ready to say everything he had said over text. It’d be hard to open himself up this way, but he had to do it. Sebastian refused to miss out on something that could be great. Something that could literally change him as a person and make him better than before. Sebastian moved to the couch to take a seat on the couch. Patting the spot next to him, his entire front was faced towards. “I meant it. Every word,” he started. “I… I really care about you, Blaine. And I don’t fucking know how it happened or even why it did. All I know is that I want you in ways that measure beyond just your body.”
Blaine stopped by the entrance to the living room. One hand lifted to gesture for Sebastian to go make himself comfortable in spite of the slightly trembling fingers that motioned for him to do so giving away the fact that Blaine was winding himself into a ball of nerves at breakneck speed. He turned to go get them water and stopped abruptly when Sebastian spoke up. Busted. The moment he tried to steal to calm himself down was called out and stolen away before he could make it more than two steps. “Sure. No distractions.” Deflating with a drawn out sigh–he warily looked back first and then turned the rest of his body to match the glance over his shoulder and slowly followed Sebastian to the couch. Sitting down beside him–Blaine bit his lip on the way down and didn’t let it go as he propped one bent knee up on the cushion, hooked the back of his knee over the inside of that ankle and gripped his calf with both hands so that he could match Sebastian’s facing him and meet his eyes.
He wished he hadn’t four words in because what he heard struck him hard. Sebastian cared about him. The problem was? “I really care about you, too, Sebastian.” More than he should. So said the heavy drag of guilt in his stomach and an eerie quiet that he’d been in since they parted the way they did. Other people were noticing. Everyone was noticing. And he blamed it on anything but the truth. “I didn’t mean to make you feel rejected. That’s the last thing I wanted,” his eyes went owlish, blinking away tears he felt building up. “I messed up. I just miss you and I feel like I seriously blew something that was..,” he cleared his throat and shook his head stopping there. “I told you in texts but I wanted to say it right away. I’m really..really sorry.”
pianokeysandbowties 