kurt.

It was surprisingly easy to sleep regularly. Kurt expected demons to be insomniacs or not need sleep at all, but they weren’t and they did and even after he started killing he didn’t loose a blink. He hoped tonight would prove surprising as well and he’d just not have to open his eyes until someone woke him. “You’re not an idiot Blaine..” He inhaled sharply. “The night before I left, I stood outside your house until you turned your light off to sleep. It sounds creepy like that,” He chuckled briefly and weakly. “but, I wanted to make sure you were you were safe and sleeping.” He sighed, absently tracing small circles on Blaine’s back with his fingertips.
“I hadn’t talked to anyone besides him all day. I thought if everyone could go one day without a word from me then they could get used to it and I wouldn’t have to feel guilty. I don’t really understand it myself…” He trailed off. He’s pretty sure he chose this story to prove he was dumber than Blaine could possibly be, but he was starting to just mumble as sleep beckoned.

Blaine carded his fingers through Kurt’s hair until he was cupping the back of his head as he listened. A crease of disbelief and hurt formed between his eyebrows as he lifted up on one elbow. Unsure of what to say, Blaine nodded letting fingers graze from Kurt’s hairline to his cheek.  Kurt should have knocked on the door.  Hearing he was within feet of preventing all of this from happening by coming to him?  Instead of choosing to disappear and become–what he was–?  He tried to laugh when Kurt did but couldn’t.  Only a smile came out of the effort but it faded quickly.

Who else other than an idiot would know the truth and suffer through the distance leading up to Kurt leaving that had him questioning everything about himself and only be able to say that ‘loved’ was the wrong word?  He wasn’t happy with Kurt’s choice, not anywhere close. Anger was only a step away and he felt it lingering in the background building up to something he kept ignoring because he was too afraid that if he let it out?  Kurt would be gone and the one emotion he felt above anything else?  That love would break him apart worse if he lost it this go round. Then again?  It was hard to lose something he didn’t even know if he had, wasn’t it? Blaine still wasn’t able to figure that part out.  If Kurt loved him or didn’t.  It was a question he was too afraid to ask. “I could never get used to being without you, Kurt,” he whispered.  “You aren’t that easy for me to let go, you know?”  But–Kurt was mumbling groggily and Blaine wasn’t going to keep pushing.  “Not tonight.  We don’t need to talk about it.  You’re tired.  I’ve got you,” his arm wrapped firmly around Kurt’s middle and pulled him close. “Get some sleep.”